THINGS I THANK AND PRAY TO GOD FOR 

(Reflections delivered by Manila Archbishop Gaudencio B. Cardinal Rosales during the Mass with bishops and Manila clergy for his 75th birthday (August 10, 2007) on August 8, 2007 at 10 a.m. at the Arzobispado de Manila)

For seventy-five continuous years God has enriched me with gifts I never deserved nor asked for. Somehow I was awakened to a state of consciousness and I was fully aware that I am alive. I never asked for life; life was a complete gift God gave me using my father and mother to share with me this human existence, which much later I would know as my imaging of the good and compassionate God (Genesis 1:26-27) – source of all that I have and would ever receive. I simply learned to enjoy life. Then I discovered how to ask for extensions, for stronger health for myself and those who love me, like my parents and siblings. And because of the giftedness of life I earned the privilege to love and value life itself as an image of the giver, God Himself.

Then I learned how to thank God that I was born and raised in a God-loving and God-fearing family with all my siblings calling attention to both the counsels and examples of our loving parents. I learned integrity, prayer, hard work and humility from my parents and elders. Ours was a very happy family; this was another great gift of God. Love, however, did not spare us from tragic disappointments and failings, but together we were able to go ahead.

I was a young teenager when the Second World War ended, when the idea of the sacred and holy came back from my acolyte years before the war. Thus, when the idea of pursuing the Priesthood became my firm desire in 1947, I received the support of my mother, brothers and sisters with the then reluctant permission of my very concerned father. I distinctly remember him telling him that although a Priest was not exactly what he foresaw me to be, nevertheless he added, "… if that is what you want, and if that is what will make you happy, then, I ask you only to become a good priest." As early as then he told me stories of less edifying "men of the cloth." He was in effect telling me that my only choice was not the Priesthood, but to become a good priest. How can I ask God for another gift? My unknowing father had already revealed the gift to me!

Back then I did not realize that the priesthood that I wanted would make me extremely happy. That was perhaps the fear of my father, that after some years, priestly zeal and the love would die out and his son would be either a disappointment or become an unhappy pastor.

Accompanied by an uncle who himself was an ex-seminarian, my parents brought me to San Jose Seminary at 2821 Herran, Sta. Ana, Manila, where the Jesuit fathers, who became my second parents, took over in guiding the studies and formation that would eventually lead me to the Sacred Priesthood. Another gift was given me making me unafraid even before grave difficulties; I learned to pray and to undertake serious study and research on my own.

Year by year it was my fortune to come under the tutelage of holy and very dedicated Jesuit priests as my formation guides. I could not ask for more! At that time and place they were the best that God could provide me. "God guiding, all education is self-formation in the sense that even God cannot help or work with unwilling subjects." One holy Jesuit priest, Father James McCann, kept reminding me of that hard truth

Everything depended on God but any accomplishment would need my cooperation.

Very quietly, hard work became my brand. But I love not being noticed. I hardly realized then that simplicity of life was my original preference. I loved my studies and my work and I was not interested in anything else other than what was asked of me at the present moment. If God is here now why proceed to tomorrow. I am not sure whether this was the reason why, after eleven years of seminary formation I hesitated to ask immediately for Priestly Ordination. I remember praying for death, even asking God to strike me dead as I made the Way of the Cross at the San Jose Seminary chapel in Highway 54. Unknown to many, even at the eve of my ordination to the priesthood I had to be accompanied by much assurance and encouragement from my spiritual director, Father Leo Cullum. Fr. James McCann, who mentored us in the authentic and demanding basics of Ignatian Spirituality and Exercises was already the Novice Master at the Sacred Heart Novitiate in Novaliches. AT the height of my inner confusion, Fr. Cullum was made president of the Ateneo de Manila but he had the extreme kindness of finding time to be with me at my First Mass in Batangas, with the rest of the Seminary not knowing why!

Finally ordained as a priest on March 23, 1958, I was immediately assigned to help train young men and even younger boys in the minor and later the college seminaries, I learned how unrealistic I was in presenting ideals to the youth. To my regret I discovered that I was forcing an attitude rather than making an ideal attractive. I thank my God that early enough I came to know myself as a very strict mentor and formation agent rather than an encouraging companion and elder. An equation was forthcoming wherein commitment to righteousness must be seasoned by compassion and understanding of common human frailty. My daily transformation continues, “Go and learn the meaning of the words: Compassion is what pleases me, not sacrifice.” (Mt 9:13). I had to pray much in order to have a compassionate heart.

From the high point of idealism I gradually came to realize that it was not I, who after the war years was moving toward the Priesthood on my own, but it was Christ who was calling me. The Priesthood was never my affair. “You did not choose me, no, I chose you; and I commissioned you to go out and bear fruit, fruit that will last…” (John 15:16). My liking was only in response to His calling. I also remember Father Jose Crespo, who gave us a retreat and knowing the seminary I came from, he boldly told me that “…if you ever abandon prayer, you will certainly abandon the priesthood.” That was in 1960. thus I recommitted myself to serious prayer again and since then, ever!

The plan for me to do further studies in Rome was definitively discarded for fear of the consequential series of priestly defections affecting the clergy in the local churches abroad and even in Rome soon after the close of the Council (Vat. II), Bishop Olalia sadly informed me.

In May 1970 then Bishop (later Archbishop) Alejandro Olalia assigned me as Pastor in a very small barrio parish then, Bo Banaybanay in Lipa City. So few were the residents in that barrio parish and the adjacent barrios that even the bishop suggested that I need not live in the parish but could reside in the cathedral rectory with Monsignor Domingo Librea, or at the seminary. I even now recall the remark of brother priests that there was so little to do after the Sunday Masses in the barrio that I would certainly get bored.

If there was little to do after Mass, then I decided that, on weekdays, I would look for things I can do for the people. Barrio catechism classes were given to out-of-school children; the junior members of the Legion of Mary were all commissioned as catechists with themselves as the first catechized, and later tasked to teach other children; a barrio newsletter—where the parish was the editor, writer, publisher and prienter—was prepared and regularly circulated for free; adult catechesis led always to the communal celebration of the Mercy of God (Penance). The parish of San Vicente Ferre in Banaybanay was the first among parishes to initiate the common celebration of the Mercy of God (Penance) with dozens of priests assisting in the penitential rites. Daily house-to-house visitation from 2:00 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. was began with the usual beginning distrust and ending with filial appreciation among the parishioners, even up to the present. (Before God this Pastor could claim that all houses were visited during his term as Parish Priest.)

The Banaybanay pastoral experience was an eye-opener to me. It was also the re-anchoring of my spiritual life. The rich pastoral harvest, the friendship and fraternity fostered with the people and the spirit of community and the memory of the short but fruitful stay in the parish challenged me to no end. Was I only trying to assemble the people, to bring them together as persons believing and loving God? I was mainly aiming at a model parish and a community of concerned parishioners. Beyond this, was I looking for Christ Jesus?

As these were the questions left unanswered then, Archbishop Olalia transferred me to Batangas City, the largest parish in the Local Church. The responsibility of serving the parish was so great that it took five of us priests to serve that city parish. Fathers Alfredo Madlangbayan, Rafael Oriondo, Carmelo Gozos and Jose Ilagan and myself made up that happy beginning of a ministerial team of priests. We first strived to make a community of priests out of the five of us; we shared meals, reflections, planned the homilies together, short readings at table, day-to-day head pastoral responsibility (or officer of the day) and prayers were shared. We shared the rectory common room a lot! Each priest was charged with a number of barrios to care for. A holy competition and many jokes were mutually shared, underlining the shared zeal at the meal table. But this happy community of priests was short lived.

Unknown to all, most to my family, I was undergoing more than soul-searching. Alone and helpless, I was wrestling with myself on whether to accede to the request to make me a Bishop of the Catholic Church. As usual in the equation of graces or gifts in my life the lever is tilted toward simplicity of life. Caught within the lapse of the time frame given for prayer (and no consultation) the announcement of the news was released on August 11, 1974. The news of a new bishop was met with some joy, but the struggle, the soul-searching and the fear of the call continued.

Where was I going? What was the direction of leadership? Where was the call leading to? Was there a beckoning vision? Certainly God is the one calling me. He and He alone has called me to life and still keeps me alive. I am His vice gerent on earth when He made me like all humans “in His image and likeness.”(Gen. 1:26-27). Can I in my life’s remaining years still retell the story of God’s kindness, His compassion and His unconditional love?

Very clear to me is my basic call—higher even than the vocation to the priesthood and the episcopacy—is the call to image God in my whole and entire life. I was made to God’s image and likeness. I was called to be human and in that humanity I should be judged by God. The words of my father, “become only a good priest”, re-echo until now; and what he meant was that I must be good. For he felt, and I also do feel it up to now, that if only I could, with the mercy of a loving God, remain an honestly good person—always imaging the kindness, compassion, truthfulness, honesty, the understanding, forgiveness, righteousness of God, there must be no reason on earth or in any life here or in the next why I many not be a good priest and a bishop or any other.

Through my father who was a long time friend of the first Batangue ñ o Bishop, Monsignor Alfredo Maria Obviar (of Lipa) I was called to go to Lucena on August 29, 1974. After more than an hour of counsel, stories and reminders on shepherding from the Bishop, I was given as his personal gift, the very pastoral staff (baculo) that he used as a young prelate on condition that I will always use it during my entire Episcopal ministry. And I do so until this very day.

On October 23 (1974) I was ordained Bishop. As Auxiliary Bishop of Manila, I was made Parish priest of Antipolo and Bishop-in-Charge of the Circumscription of Antipolo and East Rizal (which at that time was the whole of Rizal Province). Helping me administer the large Parish was Father Feliciano Manalili, now a Trappist monk in South Carolina. With him managing both the school and the parish, I was given the precious time to move around to visit the priests and the parishes in the Circumscription (later to be called the District) of Antipolo and East Rizal. God gave me the grace to love the work at the District, and, above all, to enjoy the respect of the people, and most of all the friendship and fraternity of the priests of the place. The fidelity of the priests of Antipolo in attending the annual retreats (100% at that time), the recollections, the vicarial and district meetings as well as the common celebration of Penance and the Easter three-day excursions (100%) kept me hoping that there is much God in Jesus Christ and His priests can do to continue building up that “Kingdom of the Father” that we understand and love today.

To iron out the little remaining unrest in the seminary, in June 1980 I was made Rector of San Carlos where a good number of the present Manila clergy became both acquaintances and fellow travelers with me. It was a new accompaniment I was trying to do with them by constant interchange, dialogue and brotherly exchanges both individuals and small groups striving always to inspire and encourage in every encounter. But these new ways of accompanying lasted only two years and three months.

To the surprise of many and the great joy of a few, I was assigned coadjutor Bishop to the then Prelature of Malaybalay, which covered the whole Bukidnon province and part of Lanao del Sur, including the town of Wao and surroundings. The initial experience was akin to being transplanted to a different world. I had to learn the Binisayan language, get acquainted with the culture of the Manabo, Talaandig, Dumagats and the Mindanao settlers. September 1982 was after the MNLF rebellion and the approaching height of the violent communist NPA rebellion. To say that those were disturbingly violent and frightening days is a clear understatement. In one barrio parish (Linabo) and its adjoining barrios alone more than 124 were salvaged in a year’s time. Away from Luzon and working my way up to make friends, I sadly learned that I was not welcomed as the local clergy were expecting a native Bisayan and not a Tagalog as the second bishop of Bukidnon. It took some more time to convince them that my ministry, as well as my presence, was one part of the Good News I had to preach and that I meant no harm to any, especially because my preaching and teaching were rooted in the Gospel and the vision of the Lord. Words were simply not enough; suffering much pain and disappointment had to mediate the coming of friendship, brotherhood and final acceptance as father to sons and as teacher to disciples. The fraternity with my priests would come only after six years.

I had to suffer the murder of one of the priests, Father Nery Satur, who died protecting the integrity of the forests for the sake of the poor in order to convince the priests that truly, I was a brother and not an intruder, a father and not a master. And as the feeling of unity possessed our unity with tpirests and theprayer of the Psalmist suddenly became mine,
" …you are my son, today I have become your father” (Ps 2:7). It was then that I was transferred back to Luzon to become the seventh Local Ordinary of the Archdiocese of Lipa.

Twenty years away from my home province of Batangas I returned on March 18, 1993, knowing so few of the diocesan priests. As I returned others thought that I was really from Mindanao, speaking like a true Bisayan native and struggling to learn Tagalog and being assigned to Luzon. Having to adjust to the Tagalog culture and tongue again, being disturbed by the spreading material values of Luzon as compared to the simplicity of the South, I had to suffer again in the transition. I am now completely convinced that in order to go ahead and be so free with the Lord who calls me to freedom I have to first suffer again, die again to myself in order to rise and resume the journey to fullness of life Jesus wants me to achieve. My life’s motto has to be lived and relived and not just become a one-shot experience. “Unless the grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it yields a hundredfold.” (John 12:24).

The vision the Church in Bukidnon espoused in Mindanao saw is re-expression in the apostolic vision and direction of the Local Church in Batangas. People rallied to what they understood and accepted as their life’s expression, direction and end. Fraternity among priests was strengthened, a meaningful retirement care was instituted, care for old pastors became a diocesan-wide concern, the old theologate was reopened and sharing at the level of the evangelized began. And just then as I turned seventy-one years of age and looking deservedly towards retirement I was transferred to Manila. The Apostolic Nuncio Archbishop Antonio Franco was well aware of the refusal-reluctance tension I had to suffer before the appointment became real.

Today I am with you as your older brother, both in years and older still in experience and with a wider claim to a variety of assignments, postings, people and priests to work with the widest spectrum in the socio, economic, and cultural range. The war situations in Mindanao and the World War II experience in Luzon all stood behind me. I have met many kinds of people, good and the not very good, saints and crooks in the ministry and out. But to enjoy common experience I also had the chance to meet real saints among the priests. I thank God for them and I praise Him.

I stand before you this morning because you so kindly pray for me and thank God for me as I shepherd the flock with you, with myself as the more unworthy servant and you as trustworthy partners with Him. Already I have submitted my letter of resignation to the Holy Father Pope Benedict XVI and I conform my personal plans and my obedience to the laws and traditions of the Church as I place my entire self in God’s will and His Holiness” pleasure.

In all honesty I have come to Manila (with reluctance) but as always in the balance of grace and gifts, I, for all times, yielded to the will of God and my superiors. My task is to accompany the flock which is the local Church in Manila, to make clearer to all the direction we seek out and the way we are to travel, that we may, in the mind of God who wants you, all and myself, (all of us made in His image and likeness) to relive his goodness, truth, integrity, love and compassion; and, retelling these in our temporal existence, come to the fullness of his gift/s—LIFE—no less than HIS!

I know that as I insist on integrity, honesty and holiness in the life of the priests, you—like the other hundreds of priests that I have served and accompanied in four different Local Churches (Arch/dioceses), you are not offended. I am doing this as your older brother and above all I must do it as your father.

And on being father to all of you, allow me to quote from the Author of the Letter to the Hebrews. (Please read Hebrews 12:5-13).

I will simply obey as I once again put my entire self on the plate of offering to God with Jesus and in Jesus.

Thank you All!
God bless!

+G.B. Rosales
August 8, 2007